ice-devouring sex tornado

one word: plastics

2009-08-13T01:56:22Z

the great garbage vortex bums me way the fuck out. trash in general has been bumming me out more and more lately. i see it everywhere. i've started picking it up when i walk the dog. we live in a teenager-intensive neighborhood, so there is a lot of fucking trash, mostly related to food: soda cups, coffee cups, plastic bottles, plastic bags, six-pack rings. plastic plastic plastic plastic.

i pick it up and put it in my pockets, or i use the first bag i find and stuff all the other trash i find into it until i can't carry any more and have to dump it in a neighborhood garbage can.

i don't think there is one place in my life where i can look in any direction and NOT see something made of plastic.

i'm going to try to reduce the amount of plastic i purchase by 75%. i may not be buying much stuff anymore. it's a good excuse to buy all-leather shoes. and expensive phyto shampoo that comes in glass bottles (plastic caps). is it possible to buy an entirely bio-degradable pair of sneakers?

jesus on the fucking cross - seriously. there has got to be a better way.

no news is good news

2009-05-23T05:24:42Z

i am astonishingly well. been reading, but not posting. it seems that i don't have much to say to the innernets when i'm happy and unconflicted. haven't been writing much anywhere, anyway, except at work.

my second writing class filled up quickly and with very few dollars spent on marketing. it feels so good to have an idea and to execute it successfully. this is the first one that i've done all by myself, that i've put my whole effort into. really gratifying to know that i can do this. i've aborted a lot of creative projects, both solo and group, and i hadn't realized what shame i was carrying about that until i finally followed through with one and it succeeded. it gives me courage to try others.

i've been adopted by a group of clever, healthy, intelligent, good-natured, adult humans. that also feels good. i'm getting to know people's kids. it's such a sweet feeling to have a 3-year-old recognize me and smile when i come over for dinner.

i'm dancing more, mostly in my living room. actually learning steps and moves. getting stronger, nimbler.

my garden is rocking. blue himalayan poppies are also making me really happy.

personal life continues to be placid and even-keeled. not dating. it doesn't suit me. 95% of the trauma in my personal life has stemmed from relationship woes. i am learning a different way to be. one that doesn't involve feeling shitty about myself. sometimes the simplest things are the hardest to understand and implement.

i will graduate from hippie school in one month. i'm a reiki master now, for whatever that's worth. i sure like it.

busy. healthy. happy. i think i could get snowed into my house next christmas and potentially not even eat myself alive. it feels good.

xo

published again

2009-02-11T01:15:47Z

check out my interview with screenprinter strawberryluna on the bluebottle art blog

matilda @ 2009-02-05T20:26:00

2009-02-06T04:26:59Z

FINALLY - site launch

2009-01-16T23:47:00Z

http://www.writefairytales.com

check out my writing workshop. pass it on.

Bluebottle Art Gallery

2008-11-12T07:29:50Z

Hey, y'all - I've been helping out at the Bluebottle Art Gallery for a couple of months now, and I've recently started on their blog.

That's http://artcraftanddesign.blogspot.com/ .

Check it out. Leave a comment on the latest entry and be entered to win a charming, original print by Julie West.

matilda @ 2008-11-07T22:08:00

2008-11-08T06:06:18Z

my friend jason died three years ago on this very day.

i got to see his body in the hospital while it still looked like him, got to pet his face one last time before it turned to Something Else.

i'm lucky. i'm really lucky that i got that time with him after he passed. it made the transition make more sense.

in other news, come see me on sunday:

for washington state voters

2008-10-24T07:35:32Z

note from my friend, deb, who has stage 4 lung cancer that has spread throughout the bones in her spine and hips:

I urge you guys to vote YES ON I-1000.

When it comes down to it, given the state of my advanced disease, I would want to know that I could decide to "die with dignity" if I felt I needed to. I realize this is a polarizing topic for many people, most of all my family. But I've had a taste of what this disease can hand out, and I have a reasonable expectation of where I may be going with it. If my spinal metasteses or hips give way and I'm paralyzed... if I survive happily and healthily for another 5 years... doesn't matter. I believe this bill is important for terminally ill people of all stages.

Thanks.. [steps down off soapbox and wanders into kitchen for more coffee]
xoxo

gratitude hits the innernets

2008-10-06T03:19:31Z

published again!

[edit: forgot to give credit where credit is due. humanitics is the inspiration for this article. thank you, juliette!!]

matilda @ 2008-10-02T13:56:00

2008-10-02T20:50:31Z

how do i find out who owns a certain url?

matilda @ 2008-09-20T19:13:00

2008-09-21T02:07:46Z

happy birthday logan!

happiness

2008-08-27T18:58:39Z

matilda @ 2008-08-22T09:43:00

2008-08-22T16:38:27Z

okay, so none of my shit works in firefox. my floating left nav? broken. images? broken. no background colors and no set container size.

basically my css eats shit in firefox.

grrrrr.

please give feedback

2008-08-22T02:26:10Z

http://amyleighmorgan.com/

okay. this is the new fairy tale workshop website. all critical feedback is welcome.

matilda @ 2008-08-04T18:36:00

2008-08-05T01:32:05Z

i really like the work i'm making lately

matilda @ 2008-07-07T21:19:00

2008-07-08T04:15:25Z

school is going well, thank you!

matilda @ 2008-06-16T16:29:00

2008-06-16T23:28:53Z

a baby racoon was killed by a car in front of my house last week. i saw it in the street near my garbage can in the evening. the next morning it was gone. i found it that afternoon in the middle of my driveway. (my driveway is a long, deep, shaded curl of a path that stretches up from the road through an immense laurel thicket and around behind the house.) i picked the poor thing up and put into the laurel thicket. the next morning, it was in the middle of the driveway again. so i buried it in my backyard beneath the lilac tree.

it's 4:30 on a sunny afternoon. balmy and bright, languid and lazy. i have been reading in the backyard lounge chair. i got up to go inside and saw a teenage-sized racoon walking in my driveway. in broad daylight. we looked at one another for a while.

i wonder if that's the one who moved the dead baby into the driveway the second time. i wonder who moved it the first time. i wonder if the racoon is out in mid-day looking for the little body.

i wonder.

matilda @ 2008-06-10T08:48:00

2008-06-10T15:48:41Z

okay, seriously what the fuck? rain city. rain central. death by rain.

i was a fool to book a return ticket from hawaii.

gratitude article

2008-05-21T18:13:01Z

this is what i submitted to my editor:

The Gratitudes: A Hardened Cynic Goes Soft
By Amy Leigh Morgan

When I was younger, I cultivated an attitude of worldly negativity the
way some people studied for the bar exam. I knew some sincere,
optimistic people, sure. I even befriended a few of them. But let me
assure you that I would rather have eaten my own arm than participate
in anything smacking of Oprah Winfrey, the New Age, or any other
self-help hoo-ha. This attitude served me well for a long time and I
found no reason to change it until about three years ago when my life
began to fall apart. I won't bore you with the details, except in
synopsis: three deaths of people dear to me, a heartbreaking
relationship that took two years to implode, a close friend diagnosed
with stage four lung cancer. There were other, smaller disasters, too,
but those are the highlights.

As I watched my life disintegrate, I discovered two things. One: In
the face of honest despair, worldly negativity is about as useful as a
designer handbag in a war zone - it's cute, but it's not going to save
your life. Two: I had no other way to cope with these traumas, except
to lie on the floor and think idly about killing myself. I realized
that I had to try something new before things got out of hand. And so
I performed an act of sheer desperation: I wrote to the most sincere,
optimistic woman I know and I asked her for advice.

Her response was quick and gracious. She even gave me detailed
instructions. They were so simple that I almost didn't follow them. I
may have snorted in cynical disdain the first time I read them. Then I
remembered that she speaks four languages, travels constantly, and has
been her own boss for years. She is, in fact, the happiest person I
know. In the comparison sheet of our lives, she came out ahead on
every count. Though it hurt to admit, sincerity and optimism were
gaining ground.

First easy instruction: set aside a few minutes every couple of days
to write down 13 intentions (things I want to do, have, be). Second
easy instruction: write down 13 gratitudes (things I already have and
am grateful for). Simple, yes? Well, the intentions were easy. There
were a million things that I wanted to do, have, or be. But the
gratitudes … now that was another story. I actually cried when I made
my first gratitude lists because they reminded me of all I'd lost, all
that I could no longer be grateful for. But it was good to remember
the things I had left, like indoor plumbing, electricity, and the
internet. Sometimes I'd list the internet twice, just to make it
easier on myself.

As months passed, the intentions became something I rushed through in
order to get to the gratitudes. The gratitudes, though harder,
intrigued me. The gratitudes revealed a map of my pleasures in a time
when I was sure there were no pleasures left. One day I noticed that
my gratitudes were (gasp!) expanding. In addition to the internet and
indoor plumbing, I found that I was grateful for red flannel sheets,
ripe cantaloupe, and the cute baristas at the coffee shop near my
house. The more I noticed these small pleasures, the more I remembered
to indulge myself in them. The more I indulged myself in them, the
better I felt. I got rid of the cold, white, scratchy sheets I hated
and bought another set of red flannel sheets. I splurged on ripe
cantaloupe. I bought a coffee every morning so I could flirt with the
baristas. These things may not sound exciting to you, but they felt a
lot like luxury to me.

And that is the point. Mapping your gratitudes is about discovering
your own, very personal pleasures. It allows you to appreciate what's
already there, right in front of your face. And once you recognize it,
it's easier to say 'yes' to it more often. Saying 'yes' to smaller
pleasures gave me the courage to say 'yes' to larger pleasures, ones I
might not have noticed before tuning in to this strange new station.
For example, I started reading fairy tales for the first time in
years, simply because I loved them. This led me to write my own fairy
tales. The positive feedback I received from my friends gave me the
courage to start a creative writing workshop that is now in its second
sold-out round. No kidding. This fruity, New Age stuff actually works.

Mapping your gratitude brings you face to face with the truth of
yourself – what you really like, who you really are. It's easy to get
caught up in wanting things you think you should want; it's harder
(and more important) to know what you honestly enjoy, regardless of
what your internal critics say. We spend so much of our lives mapping
our discontent. We recite constant litanies of lack and need. "More
money, less weight, better job, better sex, better skin …" But how
often do we recite litanies of abundance and pleasure? Not often
enough, apparently. There is value in knowing what doesn't work in
your life. Your discontent tells you where to make adjustments, where
things could be better. But I have discovered that there is more than
a little value in knowing what does work in your life, especially when
times get rough.

for hydrozoa

2008-05-12T01:11:00Z

my friend rachelle is doing illustrations for a jewish rock album. the visual pun is that there is an actual rock in the pictures. jewish. rock.

rachelle lives in amsterdam, but she used to live in new york. my point is that i don't know whence these rocking jews hail, the ones who have commissioned this very silly project.

i like my friends a lot.

matilda @ 2008-04-28T21:26:00

2008-04-29T04:23:21Z

i fucking love this page

matilda @ 2008-04-20T17:45:00

2008-04-21T00:42:34Z

we didn't make it to the ice caves, but we did spend a lot of time dorking around in the snow.

matilda @ 2008-04-20T17:37:00

2008-04-21T00:34:23Z

matilda @ 2008-04-17T23:17:00

2008-04-18T06:15:01Z

right now i feel like a genius.

shazam

2008-04-11T01:08:09Z